Okay, maybe I won't ever really be able to talk about miscarrying. I still cry, but not as much as I used to. I think about it every day, though.

On Monday, I went to have the first prenatal ultrasound. Instead of a 10-11 week old baby, there was an empty placenta. Rather than a baby, I had a blighted ovum. The baby never even started forming.  I had surgery on Wednesday. A D & C, to be specific. Obviously, I survived. I am not ready to talk about this in full, but I will eventually get around to telling what all has happened this week.

No wedding ceremony. :(

Craving: radishes, celery, ranch dip, and ice water.

We are losing our 3rd highest-paying client. As a result, we have canceled our wedding. We will still get married by the end of the year, but the ceremony and reception will be later. Well, maybe we will do a very small ceremony... immediate family, very close friends, and Bob only. We'll worry about that later, I guess.

     Late Wednesday night, and into Thursday morning, Brandon helped Marty move into an apartment. Right before we went over to Marty's, we got into a fight, so I almost didn't even go. Brandon threw it in my face that I have feelings for Marty. He mentioned something Marty did that was super sweet for the girl he likes, and I guess I didn't react the way Brandon wanted me to. I don't even know that I did react? I think I just said, "oh." Brandon said, "If you care about him then you should want him to be happy." It wasn't the words so much as the tone that bothered me, I guess. I do want Marty to be happy. Marty's my friend. I've been saying for a while he needs a girlfriend. Hell, I told him to "go for it" with the girl he likes. He's liked her for, I don't know, five years or more?
     I can't really say I helped with the moving, as I mostly just stood there. One of the few things I did do was carrying Marty's bedding into his new room. That didn't go so well. The "I'm carrying a guy's bedding and probably have dried man-juice on my jacket" thought popped into my head, and I tripped into the apartment. *facepalm*
     I'm pretty happy for Marty, but I have concerns about him living with Cole, and thus having to deal with Cole's girlfriend. Also, their bedrooms are beside each other.

     I feel like I've been eating everything in sight today. My co-workers have commented on me losing weight, and while the comments are encouraging, I also think, "oh shit, if I gain it back, they'll notice," and "well, now I have to keep losing weight." I've only lost five or ten pounds. I'm not sure how they noticed, since I don't even see much difference. Actually, I think as soon as I go pee, I am going to hop onto the Wii Fit and do some Super Hula Hoop!